I wanted to thank Linda Fitzgerald of The Women’s Place Network for sparking this conversation on betrayal. I really resonated with her post, which inspired me to write about how I had a major betrayal in my business life, too.
Linda offers 8 brilliant suggestions for getting beyond this emotional quagmire. Of course, I had a twist or two to add. Here’s what I shared:
You’re so wise, Linda, to take time to reflect and heal after this disheartening incident. As entrepreneurs we push down our feelings because ‘it’s business’ and that’s not personal. Truth is, business is absolutely person and emotional.
Emotionally Smart solopreneurs are the ones who learn to manage their emotions, sit with the emotions of others, and act from a place of compassion and strength. You get the brass ring- deeply satisfying work with clients you connect to who respect you and are happy to pay your work.
Love the 8 steps you shared! My twist on #2 is remembering to tell your friend or adviser how you want them to listen: for support or for problem-solving. You’ll get better help if they know what you want.
I teach my clients get beyond their feelings of betrayal (#4)and blame by increasing compassion- for themselves and the other person through ‘complexifying’, seeing the full picture of you.
Linda, I could hug you for talking about working with a mediator, or third party, to craft what I call a rehabilitation plan. Mediators are skilled in helping you talk things out calmly and privately. Every city has at least one community mediation center that offers services at a reasonable cost.
Years ago, my biz partner at the time and I went to mediation to end our work relationship after a bout of betrayal. It really helped us air misunderstandings and regain perspective. We didn’t remain friends but we repaired our relationship enough to be cordial and not make waves in our small work community, where people would’ve felt awkward with the rift.
Thanks, Linda, for bring this important topic to the light. You’re shining brightly so we can see the path and I appreciate that!